Rumpelstiltskin — Lyrics

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See how the story goes

See how the story goes.  It's a story that no-one knows.
See how the story grows.  That's the fun of the story.
SOLO:Once there was a little man.
ALL:Little man, Little man.
SOLO:(Pause.) He used to sleep in a frying pan.
ALL:Long, long ago.
SOLO:He would rest his weary legs.
ALL:Weary legs, weary legs.
SOLO:(Pause.) Between the bacon and scrambled eggs.
ALL:Long, long ago.
SOLO:Then there was a sudden flood.
ALL:Sudden flood, sudden flood.
SOLO:(Pause.) The man was covered in filthy mud.
ALL:Long, long ago.
SOLO:In the mud he couldn't breathe.
ALL:Couldn't breathe, couldn't breathe.
A pause — nobody can think of a good rhyme.
RUMPELSTILTSKIN:(suddenly appearing from behind the large bush) He ate the bacon and scrambled free!

I'm the Miller

MILLER:I'm the Miller; I'm the best!  I'm a cut above the rest.
I'm the man who harnesses the power.
And you must agree that you all need me,
When I grind your harvest into flour.
There are farms everywhere,
there are fields going spare,
but we've only got one mill.
So while my wheel keeps turning round,
I'm the most important person still.
He struts about self-importantly and doesn't hear the Villagers' retort.
VILLAGERS:He's the Miller; he's the worst!
We're surprised he doesn't burst.
He's so full of pompousness and pride.
And he talks and talks, and he talks and talks,
If we can't find anywhere to hide.
If we just had a chance we could lead him a dance,
but we've only got one mill.
So we just have to bide our time,
though it really goes against our will.
MILLER:And my daughter is the best!  She's a cut above the rest.
She's too good for any sons of yours!
She's so sweet and kind, with a first rate mind,
And she cooks and sews and sweeps the floors.
She can do anything; she'd be fit for a king.
She could spin straw into gold!
She really is a perfect girl,
And she always does as she is told.
VILLAGERS:Yes his daughter, we agree, is as kind as she could be,
And we love to watch her passing by.
Though we'd not been told of the trick with gold,
We would really like to see her try.
It's a shame, all the same, that her dad's such a pain,
Ever since he lost his wife.
So we just hope she'll meet a bloke
who can offer her a better life.

The Spell

RUMPELSTILTSKIN:When you're making a spell, if you want to do well
you must be in a good state of mind.
You must try to relax, with no panic attacks;
you must leave all your problems behind.
Don't let your mind wander; remember to ponder
the job that you want to achieve.
Don't let yourself wonder if you're going under:
You just have to hope and believe.
When you're making a spell it's important to dwell
on the words that you plan to recite.
It's essential to feel that you're making them real,
and it helps if you get them all right!
There's magic around and as soon as you've found it
you're ready to make it your own.
If men really knew what a goblin could do,
he would soon be a king on a throne.
That's it!  All's well!  I'm ready to weave the spell.
Lights down except for overhead spot on Rumpelstiltskin as he sits down at the spinning-wheel.
Round about, round about, lo and behold.
Reel away, reel away, straw into gold.
Round about, round about, lo and behold.
Reel away, reel away, straw into gold.
A group of goblins run silently into the darkened arena.  Possibly a flicker-wheel to illuminate bright items of their clothing as they move.  They dance and sing.
GOBLINS:Round about, round about, lo and behold.
Reel away, reel away, straw into gold.
Round about, round about, lo and behold.
Reel away, reel away, straw into gold.
They continue to make magical incantations while he sings.
RUMPELSTILTSKIN:Something tells me it's the only
thing that I can do for Hannah.
Such a kind girl shouldn't have to die.
Even though she doesn't know me
I would risk my life for Hannah.
I may fail, but I must still try.
ALL:Round about, round about, lo and behold.
Reel away, reel away, straw into gold.
Round about, round about, lo and behold.
Reel away, reel away, straw into gold.

Citizens of Berlin

CITIZENS:We are the citizens, the citizens of Berlin,
And here you will find the palace of the King.
Here there are parks, there are gardens and streams.
So much to do: a place full of dreams.
We prance and we dance, and we like to make a din.
For we are the citizens, the citizens of Berlin.
SOLO:Here in the city walls the darkness is kept as bay.
But out in the forest we're far from the light of day.
Creatures of every kind are waiting for us, we fear.
But here in the city they never could appear.
Repeat chorus.
Yes we are the citizens, the citizens of Berlin.

Clothes make the man

ENGELBERT:When a guy is hoping to make a splash,
We'll be happy to help him, if he's got the cash.
He may be good looking, but everyone knows
What he really needs is the clothes.
He may be a wizard with stocks and shares,
But if he's out of fashion then nobody cares.
He may rule an army with thousands of men,
But his clothes are something else again.
(The verses could be split between Engelbert and other singers if required.)
TAILORS:Clothes make the man!
ENGELBERT:(spoken) You'd better believe it baby!
TAILORS:Clothes make the man!
ENGELBERT:Everyone knows!
TAILORS:If you think your life's a failure,
All you need to do is see your tailor.
Just make a plan.
ENGELBERT:We got big plans for you!
TAILORS:Soon as you can!
ENGELBERT:No time like the present!
TAILORS:And the first thing to remember is:
Clothes make the man.
ENGELBERT:When you know you're wearing the coolest gear,
You can wander the city with nothing to fear.
Don't you know the story of how it began?
Don't you know that clothes make the man?
Now a guy called Adam was in despair;
He was stuck in a garden with nothing to wear.
But he got some clothing to dazzle his girl,
And he then went on to rule the world!
TAILORS:Clothes make the man!
ENGELBERT:You never see scruffy people
TAILORS:Clothes make the man!
ENGELBERT:ruling the world!
TAILORS:If you think your life's a failure,
All you need to do is see your tailor.
Just make a plan.
ENGELBERT:You know you won't get far
TAILORS:Soon as you can!
ENGELBERT:in second-hand clothing!
TAILORS:And the first thing to remember is:
Clothes make the man.
ENGELBERT:(walking round the audience) (spoken)
Take a look at this guy he's wearing a sweater.
Put him into a suit, he'd look so much better.
Now I don't really care about your — — education.
With the right kind of clothing you could — — rule the nation!
ALL:Clothes make the man!
Clothes make the man!
If you think your life's a failure,
All you need to do is see your tailor.
Just make a plan.
Soon as you can!
And the first thing to remember is:
Clothes make the man.

The Spell (reprise)

GOBLINS & RUMPELSTILTSKIN:Round about, round about, lo and behold.
Reel away, reel away, straw into gold.
Round about, round about, lo and behold.
Reel away, reel away, straw into gold.

Let's have a party!

SOLO:It's been just a year since Queen Hannah was crowned.
The wedding was quite an occasion.
The King looked a sight and the Miller got tight
And only sat down with persuasion.
ENGELBERT and the TAILORS enter part-way through the chorus and join in.
Let's have a party!
Some good German beer to add to our cheer.
We want a party!
And that's why we're dressed up so smartly.
Let's have a party!
While we celebrate these matters of State.
We don't mind the King or the weather
As long as we're drinking together.
SOLO:And now there's a baby to double their joy.
We've come here to celebrate also.
The King's disappointed; he wanted a boy!
You can't please some people at all though.
The curtains open slightly to represent the cathedral door.  People appear at both sides of the apron and enter the doorway, greeted by the BEADLE with his ceremonial staff.
SOLO:We've cheered as we've watched the procession go past.
They're all headed for the cathedral.
The princess will come to be christened at last;
They're met at the door by the Beadle.
All through the nation, it's time for a great celebration.

The Christening

ALL BUT KING AND HANNAH:Hail to the King!  Hail to the King!
Long may he rule our land.
We praise him for his tact and wisdom:
(low) Only in jest, you understand.
Hail to the Queen!  Hail to the Queen!
Now we can be sincere.
We praise her for her love and kindness,
Since she was crowned last year.
Hail to the Princess!  The child for whom we pray.
With heart and voice we welcome her today.
Those in the arena turn to face the on-stage action.  The Nurse comes forward and hands the baby to the Bishop while the choir sing.
CHOIR:Now within this holy place
See your people gathered here
Look upon this little child
Safe from danger; free from fear
Fill her spirit with your grace.
On the word "grace" the door bursts open to reveal RUMPELSTILTSKIN.  Everyone shrinks away from him. 

Life is getting better

CHILDREN:When the sun's in the sky, and we go out to play,
We can just close our eyes and remember the day
When we first met Rumpelstiltskin.
Now Hannah and he can live happily.
The VILLAGERS enter in time for their verse.
VILLAGERS:Now the King's not around, and the taxes are down,
We are all better off, and we're holding our ground.
It was really an upheaval
To learn that goblins aren't all evil.
There's a feeling all around us.  It's a kind of open letter.
Everything is telling us that life is getting better.
If you learn to feel the magic,
You can cast a spell, and that means
For the moment, we can tell that things are going well.
The GOBLINS run on in time for their verse.
GOBLINS:Though we don't want to dwell on the power of a spell,
You can see it was that making everything well,
So if you should meet a goblin,
Don't send him away.  Invite him to stay.
The next four enter on the apron.
BISHOP, BEADLE, LORD CHAMBERLAIN, INGEMAR:There is joy all around on the streets of Berlin.
Though we have to admit, we don't envy the King
Would you want to be a statue,
With everybody looking at you?
Fanfare.  The curtains open to reveal the King's statue on a pedestal, with all the remaining performers around it.  Everybody cheers.
GWENDOLINE:Now I feel quite at home, and it's really a treat
When I get for my lunch all the rats I can eat.
I would say that things are purrrrrr-fect.
No worries or strife.  Yes this is the life!
MILLER:Well I said from the start she was clever and keen.
It was all thanks to me that she got to be Queen.
Only one thing makes me ill now —
She won't come home and clean the mill now!
Rumpelstiltskin and Hannah enter and stand centre-stage.
HANNAH:This was a land of shadows.  Here I was forced to stay.
I was alone in darkness, searching for the day.
You were the path I followed out of the land of shadows.
RUMPELSTILTSKIN:This was a land of shadows.  I was the same as you.
Seeing the world against me.  Nothing I could do.
And then I found an answer, and my answer was you.
She takes his hand.  He looks nervous at the touch, then smiles.
BOTH:Yours was the hand to guide me, showing me the way.
No more a land of shadows,
Now I can see the light of day.
Engelbert and the Tailors push through the crowd to the front of the stage.
ENGELBERT & TAILORS:Though we seem to have lost quite a lot of our trade,
We will still carry on and we won't be dismayed.
We will sail for foreign waters,
And maybe pursue an Emperor too!
ALL:So we find as we come to the end of the show,
Though we're quite satisfied we would still like to know
What the King would say about it.
Pause while they all watch the statue, expecting it to speak.
But he's a statue; he can't shout it!
For the moment, we can tell that
things — are — go — ing — well.